Your mom escaped authorities by wearing a disguise and pretending you were a girl. Ten years later, she’s in jail with the male population and you’re going by the name “Biscuit”.

I ran into your mom the other day. She made a huge dent in my car, the fucking bitch!

I saw your mom walking down a busy street and yelled, “Fuck off!” She grabbed the nearest creature, a poor old bum, and dry humped him down the long road.

I took a shit that looked just like the Virgin Mary. Your mom was there and I sold it to her for a million dollars.

When God made your mom, He was taking a shit. That’s why.

The military is very interested in your mom. She sticks knives and swords inside her vagina to apply a lethal amount of poison to her blade.

Going camping with your mom is great. Her yeast infected vagina makes the best corn dogs around.

Your mom is so trashy, she lactates ranch dressing from one nipple and Mountain Dew out the other.

Your mom auditioned to work at a carnival. When she spread em’, the whole town fit under her “umbrella.”

Jumping out of the airplane, I was lucky to grab onto your mom’s flapping vagina. The makeshift parachute helped me land safely on the ground.

Your mom decided to shave a bit to clear up some gender confusion. Now the media is bombarded with chupacabra sightings.